Warning: not for kids! Oftentimes, the most inhumane violence done to others is that which we inflict through our passive-aggressive silences. Sometimes a punch to the face is easier than seeing the back of someone else’s apathetically silent head. I explore that a bit in this rather visceral piece.
My ears are ringing, ringing,
ringing from the deafening roar of stony silence.
Someone has been shouting at me for so long
without stopping,
never stopping,
ever.
The lids of my ears are pinned back
as scenes of your violent ennui pelt my psyche.
Ghoulish shrieks of the banshee gash holes in my bowels
and any remains of touch and sound lay shredded and splayed
on the table, once of communion, now of refuse.
Quickly, cut open my gut with a heated knife of angry words.
Split my head with the axe of honest, unimplied hatred.
It is more compassionate to watch another bleed,
their blood still wet on the tip of your axe than it is
to watch through a mirror as another
squirms and writhes under the torturers knife
of guesses, unanswered questions, pale assumptions, made up half-truths.
Like the wanderer, banished and scapegoated,
the unforgiven walk in barren, featureless landscapes
peppered with the memories of better days.
The shrieks of silence are so much louder
than the shouting of angry, cutting…but honest, words.
Wordless words spill out into the aether
through sealed lips, drowning in their own denial
of non-communication. Oh, I hear. I hear. I hear,
SO STOP YOUR FUCKING SHOUTING.
Your victims are only fed enough sanctimony to forbid reality,
deny context, withhold boundaries for the untold story.
The din of merciless words is quicker,
the pain, short; the gouching, swift.
Silent pain is relentless, without pity,
casting scorn through indifference,
hatred through unspoken speech,
unforgiveness through apathy,
vengeance through willing ignorance.
_
In seeking truth, you’ve become the biggest lie.